Rants about random stuff

Okay so first of all im tired of studying but as a student i have to fulfil that job which is nowherr near fun. Spm is just weeks away and here i am ranting about it rather than studying. Great job yan , how stupid can u get? I didnt came to school for 3 days and it was extremely boring. Sure i have fast internet but when u use it too long u started feeling sick of it and that's where my friends comes in. I will grab any friend that i can chat with and chat with them non stop. I'll cling on them like a koala bear. Begging them not to leave xD
And it was what i did. On monday i had chat with biela then on tuesday with aidil and today with nad. I bet nad is asleep now coz she didnt reply me. If ur reading this nad,im very dissapointed in u. Derzz. I think i am obsessed with kpop now. Like really really obsessed and because of that i cant study.obviously. hmmm..i forgot what i was gonna rant about. meh laterz than.byezz.

I Dont Give A Damn About It

You know what? I'm tired of you looking down on my dreams. Why cant you just accept it? I still remember when i wanted to be a writer. At that particular time i love writing, my passion was for writing. Everything that i saw or hear i can make it into a story. That's how addicted i was to writing. I even offer to write for my friends cause i love it that much. And there was this time when i fall in love with music. Not the hip hop or pop music but rather classical one. I really love playing the piano. My heart feel at ease as my fingers dance on the piano's key. It felt relaxing and i was in love with it. No stress there and i enjoy it.And there was this time i love editing. I was addicted to editing stuff,like videos,pictures,music and even thought of doing an animation of my own using a software. I wrote a song and edited it for my dad's birthday,that was how addicted i was. I did videos with my cousins and edited it. I just like how I manage to play around the softwares. And finally my recent dream, it was to become a dietitian. I hear this career from my tuition teacher. It sounded interesting and besides it has some science in it and i thought it will fulfil the criteria but boy was i wrong. I can still remember when i told you guys about it,you guys were like 'What? Dietitian? Do you even know what it is?' 'Its hard to find jobs if you're taking that'. Here i am telling you what i like but what did you say in the end? 'You can always take that as a minor and besides you're in science class. You should take something science related' Every damn time. On every dream that i wanted. The one where i was being all jumpy and happy about it and have passion for it. That was your answer.And the last one was science related too! Dammit! What do you guys want me to be? Yes! I know you guys want me to be a doctor! You guys have been hinting me on that! But i dont want it! No doctor! No teacher! No lecturer! I already told u guys that! But being a good daughter and a sister, thinking it might have some truth behind it, I followed what you guys said. I tried finding a course that will fit your criteria. I did tell you guys that i have an interest in astronomy and meteorologist and you guys seem to like it but COME ON WHERE ON EARTH AM I GONNA FIND A JOB WITH THOSE COURSES HERE IN MALAYSIA? You wont even let me out to Penang with my friends, do you expect me to not thinking that you'll do the same when i want to go overseas to search for a job there and at such a young age? Then what will i do then? Be a hobo? Okay maybe not cause i still will be living with my parents but still ill definitely be jobless and it'll be harder to find a job. I was mad when you texted me today , after you insult about every passion i once had, i felt like, hey I DONT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT IT. I mean come on, keep on stepping on my dreams, step all over it but just for your info for you guys to know, BEWARE cause one day im the one who's gonna step all over your dreams and it aint gonna be pretty either. So yea havent updated for the longest time yet and here i am ranting about stupid stuff when i can be studying. So..yea peace~

Overshadowed

Have you ever felt being overshadowed by someone? If you have then you understand me completely.It hurts so much. It's like i'm useless as a person, i'm not saying as if i'm mad. I know this is one of Allah's test for me, so i just have to bare with it.I'm just confessing what i'm feeling. Sometimes it feels so unfair,sometimes I want to tell everyone about it so they would understand me but that would make me look weak.Even if I told anyone, I don't think some of them will understand me cause they didn't experience it. Even if they said they can relate to what i'm feeling, it's not the same.Be in my shoes, experience what i'm experiencing then tell me what you can relate. Every time when someone wants to be close to me or something I've always been thinking is it because of me? Or is it because of the person who overshadowed me? I know it sounds silly but if you're me, you will always be wondering about it. Everyone always said that i'm at an advantage because of the person that overshadowed me. I don't want to be at advantage because of the person who overshadowed me. I want to be at advantage because of me, me and only me not because of someone else. I know I should be thankful for this but it feels unfair. Everyone has problems even me. I know there are many people with much worse problems than me but hey i'm just confessing, can't I?

Song Cover

Watch it!
Awesome! xD

Teenager Post

I've been reading some quotes on 'Teenager Post' these days
They're quotes are freakin' true!
It's like they read my mind! xD
Here's the link if you want to take a look at it -----> Teenager Post

Just Curious

Why? What I did? Or it's just me being overreacting?
Since I got traumatized about this in the old days,
I still can't adapt myself in these kind of situations since I never did experience it myself
If I did experience it, it will be easier for me to understand
It's just weird thinking about this over and over again
I kept repeating the same mistakes
Huh~ I never did learned from my mistakes
This is so funny of me

Astro At My Grandparents' house

Okay,the funniest thing just happened.Wanna know? Of course you want to xD
My cousin, my little brother and I were watching astro but then we got bored because there weren't many varieties of channel
So basically, we just flipped through the channel continuously since every channel is boring but then a channel caught my attention so I asked my cousin to stopped at the channel
It was a channel  to buy other channels
My little brother was giving me 'let's-buy-a-channel' look
The thought of doing it was all over me
I mean just with a touch of a button we could buy the channels we want to...without anyone knows of course, it will be a total chaos if anyone found out about it.Hahaha.
I glance at the both of them and said "Let's do it"
I asked my cousin to look around afraid if anyone saw what we're doing
He made a face then said "You're mom and my mom are out,grandpa and grandma doesn't know about all this stuff. There's no way we will get caught"
"Good point," I said as I changed my attention to the television.
"So are we really doing this?" I said, hesitated a little.
"No one will know, so let's!" said my little brother.
Being the eldest I felt a little guilty doing this but at the same time feeling that I should do it
Suddenly a question came to my mind "Wait! Do you guys know who pays for the astro bills every month?"
I mean if its grandpa who pays for it, it would be crazy to do this but on the other hand if it was Ucu (our happy go lucky uncle).....I think it would be okay.Hahaha.
"Well, I think it's Ucu who's the one paying because he was here last time when there's astro," said my little brother.
"If he's the one paying, I guess it's okay doing it," I said smiling to myself. Not long after that our grandma came.
"What are you guys doing?" said our grandma.
"Err...nothing, just flipping through the channels," said my cousin stuttering a little.
"Granny, can I know who pays for the astro bills every month," I said.
"Of course your grandfather did," said granny. Our eyes widen when we heard her answer. Then our granny went away.
"That was so close, we were about to buy the channels just now," I said in a relieve.
There was silence for a while. I started laughing thinking about what happened, it was so funny how we even thought about buying those channel. Soon, my cousin and my little brother were laughing along after I told them the reason i was laughing.